Planning Your Wedding: Where to Start and What Actually Matters

Are you planning a wedding? Congrats! You’ve popped the champagne, stared at the ring (a lot), and now you’re wondering… “Where the heck do we start?”

You’re about to enter the wonderful world of inspiration boards, budget spreadsheets, choices, decisions, and unsolicited opinions from your third cousin’s dog groomer.

Don’t get me wrong, it can be exciting. It should be joyful. But let’s be real: sometimes it’s just a lot. The decision fatigue, the pressure to please everyone, the Pinterest overwhelm, and the looming question of “Wait, are we doing this right?”

The early stages of wedding planning can feel like being dropped into a foreign country with no map, no translator, and a whole lot of opinions flying your way. Breathe. You’re not expected to know how to plan a wedding, that’s what the pros (and this blog) are for.

You are so not alone. Here’s my celebrant-approved advice for getting through the planning process with your relationship intact, your sanity mostly preserved, and maybe even a smile on your face. Then, you can rock up on your big day feeling less stressed.

Focus on the big stuff first

Before you deep dive into colour palettes or the perfect shade of eucalyptus, get clear on the big picture.
Ask yourselves:

  • What kind of day do we actually want?
  • How do we want it to feel? Feel is the key word
  • What’s most important to us: people, party, photos, vows?

This helps you build your day from a place of meaning, not just aesthetics. When you’re clear on the heart of the day, it’s easier to say no to things that don’t serve it or you. And could possibly save you money.

Don’t plan it all at once

You do not need to lock in everything in week one. Wedding planning is more of a slow dance than a sprint. Give yourself permission to take your time and spread it out.

Here’s how to keep it manageable:

  • Start with the big-ticket items: venue, celebrant, photographer and your top priorities
  • Don’t worry about the little details yet as they’ll come later
  • Create a timeline of when to tick of items

You don’t win anything by doing it all at once – except maybe a stress headache. Take it slow. You’ve got time.

Don’t do EVERYTHING yourself

Yes, you can do it all. But you absolutely don’t have to. DIY might save you some money but how much is your time (and sanity) worth.

Delegate, outsource, and call in the troops. Got a mate who loves spreadsheets? Give them the run sheet. A sibling with a good eye? Hand them the signage. A celebrant who also happens to be an organisational queen. oh hey, that’s me. Ask for advice!

Letting go of the myth that you must DIY every detail is a fast track to enjoying the process.

Celebrant

Create planning-free times

Look, wedding planning will sneak into every conversation if you let it, but it doesn’t have to.
Set boundaries like:

  • No wedding talk after 8pm
  • One planning night per week only
  • Non-wedding date nights where you don’t talk about seating charts

Protecting time for your regular, non-wedding life helps you stay connected and reminds you why you’re doing all this in the first place. Remember, your relationship comes first.

Get comfortable saying, “That’s not for us”

There’s a weird amount of pressure to do things “the proper way” even if it doesn’t suit you. But here’s the truth: you get to choose your own version of “proper.”

Don’t want to walk down the aisle? Strut in together. No bridal party? Brilliant. Skipping the speeches, cake cutting, or first dance? Honestly, same. Hate chair covers, choreographed entrances or releasing doves? Bin it all.

Your wedding isn’t a Pinterest obligation, it’s a celebration of you two. So, chuck the rulebook, keep what you love, and give tradition a gentle shove if it doesn’t spark joy.

Choose suppliers who make it easier

Your vendors should make you feel supported, not stressed. Pick people who:

  • Communicate clearly and promptly
  • Get your vibe
  • Offer guidance without pushing their agenda
  • Leave you feeling calm, seen, and excited

If someone makes you feel overwhelmed, confused, or not listened to – trust your gut and keep looking.

A good team will make your wedding feel like a breeze. And a great celebrant (hello!) will keep things flowing, calm the chaos, and remind you to breathe.

Remember: it’s a celebration, not a performance

This isn’t opening night on Broadway, it’s your wedding. You don’t need to “wow the crowd” or get every detail perfect. What people remember most? The feeling. The joy. The love. And maybe the cocktail hour snacks.
So don’t get caught up performing the role of a perfect couple throwing the perfect day. Just be yourselves; that’s what makes it magic.

Celebrant

Last bit of advice in these early stages

You’re not just planning a wedding. You’re creating a day to celebrate the absolute legend you’re marrying. It’s allowed to be messy. It’s allowed to be non-traditional. And it’s allowed to feel like you two, not a magazine spread. So, take your time and have fun with it!

If you ever need a warm, funny, experienced voice in your corner, I’m right here.

Want to chat about how I can help bring your day to life with a ceremony that feels just right?

Let’s jump on a Zoom – I promise zero stress and good vibes only.